This words were my heart & soul

It seems like, everything was a lie.
That part i can't accept it because it seems hard.
I realised i'm getting more narrow-minded, easily agitated & worn-out.
I don't know where i stand & each day i'm made to frown, temper rising.
It gives me a feeling like i'm transparent & yet i'm so blur.
You had your fun & when i want it, i don't have a right.
A world that has gone very wrong for me, she's right it's so unfair.
There's so much to do & all i can do is to worry what's going to happen next, i never helped myself.
Missed little things & i can't help it. Spending more money each day.
This com broke down for almost a month & i was so bored locked up in my room.
I don't know why i do not have the mood to study or at least read, hopeless.
But the past week were great, had lots of inter-house & tournment lately.
We drew with East view sec 4-4, won Bedok South sec 9-0 & tmr is the final with Bedok Town.
I'm pinning all my hopes on gladys, anita, nancy, Jeni & diyana to take as many shots as possible.
Well the first game with EV, i let in 3 goals in & i never wanted to be a defender again.
I'm trying there but i'm scared when my opponement comes near me & i tend to give up easily.
Uff, this feeling kills me. I hope i do a good job tmr, i really want to enter the next round; infact everyone of us do!
Ok, the Netball interhouse started & wtf i felt like a totaly blank sheet of wall.
It was boring standing there & there were boundaries as to where we can only move.
I don't think i would go tmr to play, floorball comes first.
The sports day was so great but i never thought our class would be the Champ.
We won the class with the highest participation.
We won the sec 3/4 Champion
& we were the OVERALL CHAMPION!
Laxmi & i were shocked la, her expression makes me laugh when i remember it.
We were all working hard together for this & actually made it, i was happy to see everyone so untied that day.
The class t-shirt were a last-minute decision & many people were unhappy about it, varying from sizes to design.
But still on the actual day, everyone wore with a smile on it & that assured me!
The way they cheered for me when i was running 400m, made me realised that part.
But i came in third, i know it was a bit bad & i knew i wouldn't come 2nd nor 1st.
Okay, the whole thing was super fun with great feelings.
4E2, all the way!

PS: The whole thing was a lie